The stupid things that some people say will amaze you. As a teacher, I have a million of them from my students – and their parents. But I really want to read this book by a judge in the Spring Break paradise of South Padre Island, Spring Break: A Judge's View From the Bench.

Most have to do with public intoxication, and the often silly excuses defendants give.

"I am always glassy-eyed, talk with a slur and walk with an unsteady balance," said one.

Guilty, said the judge.

The 60-year-old judge sits in front of a colorful seascape mural and wears tennis shoes when holding court on the weekends. In general, he said, he tries to keep things a little lighter during spring break.

"My primary rule is if I have to sit up there all day, by God, they have an obligation to entertain me," he said. When he hears snickers, he tells those in the courtroom: "Go ahead and laugh. I'm going to laugh with you, because most of the time it's so darn stupid."

Like the defendant who threw a beer can out of a pickup truck and hit a police car.

"I informed him that this is Texas," Colwell wrote. "You are supposed to throw the beer cans from the cab into the back of the pickup, which has been well known for years as a traveling wastebasket."

A student from New York appeared before the judge and did not fight his indecent exposure charge, instead asking what his punishment would be.
Colwell wrote: "Instead of explaining again that in the United States you are innocent until proven guilty, I said, 'This is Texas. We don't allow men to go around exposing themselves to young ladies. We have a tree out back, and we're going to hang you.' The defendant turned pale. Being from N.Y., with tales of the Old West in his head, he actually believed me."

So far, Judge David Colwell has sold around 500 copies. Too bad he isnÂ’t hawking it on Amazon

Posted by: Greg at 12:47 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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