August 30, 2005

WhatÂ’s Wrong With This Paragraph

I encountered this bit in one of the hagiographic articles about Cindy Sheehan. I guess this is what comes of allowing bloggers from Daily Kos to write your copy.

Sheehan, whose son Casey died in Iraq, camped outside the president's Central Texas ranch a month ago to demand a meeting with him. The Vacaville, California, woman hasn't gotten an audience, but she attracted a lot of support. She's promised to carry her protest to Washington and beyond after Bush goes back to work.

Let me help you out.

1) She had a meeting with the President LAST YEAR. She can demand all she wants, but there needs to be honesty about what she really is seeking. Cindy Sheehan wants a second meeting with the president, one in which he doesnÂ’t talk and she gets to harangue him with her leftist rants about the war.

2) Sheehan has gotten support, but she has also gotten quite a bit of opposition. Why donÂ’t you mention that detail? Could it be that it doesnÂ’t fit your take on the story?

3) What is this “back to work” crap? Don’t you realize that the a presidential vacation is anything but a time of fun, sun. and no work? The briefings go on, the decisions go on, the work goes on – just in a different location.

Posted by: Greg at 12:28 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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